It’s Not Illegal to be a Jerk

NOTE: This blog was published April 13th, 2010 at LiveJournal.com before changing my blog site. This is an archive entry. The Habersports Blog - It’s Not Illegal to be a Jerk

The Ben Roethlisberger crime saga has been resolved. For the second time in eight months, Ben has been survived a serious accusation without criminal consequences. To be honest, the situation played out much as I expected.

That’s not to say I’m some kind of clairvoyant genius. I just looked at the facts as they were presented. A high profile, superstar athlete and a 20 year old college student are at a bar. They both have too much to drink, get a little too enamored with each other and decide to take their relationship to the next level. They decide to do this in a bathroom at a bar which is probably the most disturbing part of the story. Then there is some remorse, combined with alcohol and finally a police report.

The conclusion I came too early on was that Ben was likely guilty of extremely poor judgment and public behavior but not a crime. There is a huge difference between the two. Criminals go to jail. Celebrities who act like idiots in public get their imaged smashed around on ESPN and TMZ and lose their endorsements, at least for awhile.

I had serious issue with how some of the media treated Ben after the first allegation last summer. Everything we’ve heard about that situation indicates that Ben had a stalker out west. Her own friends testified that the woman off her rocker when it came to Big Ben. I did not like that she was being protected as a “potential victim of sexual abuse” while his image was being kicked around. We should protect legitimate victims of abuse, not people who file a civil suit one year later because a guy does not return their phone calls.

In that case I’m not sure Ben did anything wrong other than perhaps lead somebody on. In this case, well just see what I wrote above. Ben exercised EXTREMELY POOR JUDGMENT. And for that, his reputation should take a public beat down. His Q rating should fall and Dick’s Sporting Goods should have Hines Ward hawk their products instead of Ben. If a 28 year old celebrity wants to act like a 20 year old college student in public, I see it as justifiable punishment to deal with having his image tarnished.

Still, it is a long way from that to committing a crime. And it’s a slippery slope to start suspending players or running them out of town based on unsubstantiated accusations. We still live in a society where you are innocent until proven guilty. All we know for sure about Ben is that he put himself in a bad situation. If he really did commit this crime he should go to jail, but we simply do not have enough facts to say that he did.

It is easy to paint this scenario as the big bad football player taking advantage of the poor young college girl. There may be some truth to that but it’s far too simplistic for the real world. I think we all have a right to expect Ben to live and act at a higher standard than this but that does not let his accuser off the hook either. She was equally complicit in this situation. I will not make naïve statements about her being under 21 in a bar. Anybody who has spent time in Oakland knows that’s more the norm than the exception.

That being said, let’s not forget how many times athletes have been the victims of false accusations. We all remember the Duke Lacrosse players a few years back. I also remember some members of the Dallas Cowboys in the 90s were also accused of rape. A few weeks later, the woman admitted she was angry and had fabricated the entire story. In both cases, it was easy to believe the women. The Cowboy players were not exactly known as model citizens and I’m sure the Duke Lacrosse actions at their infamous party would not have made their families proud.

I do not feel bad for the Duke Lacrosse players because they ultimately did not end up in jail. They will move on with their lives with the biggest penalty being a lost season of Lacrosse. If you don’t believe me, I challenge you to name one individual on that team. I’m guessing most people just know them as those Duke Lacrosse players and that’s it. I have no doubt that some horrifying things went on at their party last night and I can only imagine what they said to those women that made them so angry. Given that, I think their ultimate punishment fit their crime.

Ok, maybe not crime since they did not commit one but you get my point. And the same is true for Big Ben. You may not like what he did but IF HE DID NOTHING ILLEGAL, we all need to get past it. He is an NFL football players, he’s not trying to be the next pope. To reiterate my theme of this blog, it’s not a crime to be an immature jerk. Even better, there is high potential for rehabilitation.

That same logic applies to Santonio Holmes. He clearly has some serious maturity issues and by all accounts he’s not the most beloved guy in the locker room. Like Ben, there were accusations made against him that looked bad but were likely not true. Also, there was a rush to judgment against Holmes that I found a bit disturbing, albeit his moronic twitter comments did not help.

So why did the Steelers dump Holmes for a bag of footballs and keep Big Ben? I’m hoping it related to his latest drug charge and the belief that he’s not going to change his ways. I will grudgingly accept the deal they made if they are convinced that Holmes is the next Ricky Williams; far more concerned with smoking pot than playing football. If they did it just in reaction to the charges in Florida, I will be disappointed.

To be quite honest, I think the Steelers decided to make an example of out Holmes. They needed a high profile enough player but one they felt that could move on without. You don’t trade your franchise QB in his prime so you trade an erratic number one wide receiver who at times plays like a superstar. That’s a pretty loud message albeit a tad hypocritical.

In the end, if you take away the drug situation (and maybe you can’t); Holmes is guilty of the same things as Big Ben. He’s guilty of exercising bad judgment, acting like a jerk, putting himself in a bad situation, and being falsely accused of something. We do not have to like that but none of this is a crime. I guess you could say that if he does not go to jail, that’s sufficient. Nobody has a right to be an NFL football player or a Pittsburgh Steeler. And Holmes does have to pay the price for his drug use at the NFL level.

To repeat…it is not a crime to be an immature jerk.

We need to rid ourselves of this notion that professional athletes are choir boys because for the most part they are not. There are a lot more athletes out their acting like Ben Roethlisberger than are acting like Peyton Manning or Sidney Crosby (see Woods, Tiger). The key is image protection and/or not getting caught. Michael Jordan and Tiger both became iconic athletes because they cultivated an image as great people; while hiding and protecting what was really going on.

I do not feel any sympathy when the house of cards comes flying down. That being said we need to ask ourselves why we even care. Do we root for Ben and the Steelers because we think he’s a great guy or because we want to win Super Bowls? Do we watch Tiger because we think he’s a loving husband and father or because he might be the greatest golfer ever? I’m guessing in both cases it’s that latter.

I am not excusing their behavior, nor am I suggesting we should not push these folks to live a higher standard of values. I’m disappointed in Ben to the point that I probably will not be pulling on my #7 jersey for quite awhile. That being said, I’m sure most of us have moments in our lives where we acted poorly or displayed poor judgment. We just did not have to account for our actions on ESPN.

In the end, I’m a Steeler fan and I want to see the Steelers win. The best chance of that happening…BY FAR…is with Big Ben behind center. I do not consider it selling my soul to say I’m willing to root for a guy who is great at his job but not the kind of guy I would want my sister to date. There are a lot more of those folks in sports than we want to admit.

Let me conclude with this, I do not thing Ben should be suspended. Why? For what I’ve said over and over above. It’s not a crime to be an immature jerk and it’s a slippery slope when you start suspending players for that. I would agree if Ben were a teacher or a priest that such behavior was suspension worthy. He’s not; he’s a professional football player. Let’s grudgingly accept that for what its worth and move on. That’s all we can do.