Sunday, October 24, 2010

A Rough Weekend by the Arch

I NEVER LEARN. Seriously.

Over the past three seasons, I’ve traveled approximately 3,000 square miles to watch the Penguins lose 4 games on the road. Throw in trips to Philadelphia (08) and Phoenix (07) for ugly Steeler losses and you might think I would just stay home.

Even worse, I got my wife involved this time since the Pens and Blackhawks are here for back to backs. Now she’s part of the road trips of shame.

As some sort of demented therapeutic exercise, I’ve decided to chronicle our pain. So once again, with all due respect to the great Bill Simmons, my questionably accurate timeline of this weekend’s event. All times central daylight and HEAVILY ESTIMATED.

FRIDAY, 4PM – The first sign that Emily and I are not alone in this sojourn. I get wasted by a van with a Bears’ flag and a huge Blackhawk’s logo across the back window.

FRIDAY, 5pm – The second sign, a significant contingent of Hawks fans at hotel check in.

FRIDAY, 5:30pm – At Emily’s request, I dawn a Blackhawk’s T-shirt for the Friday game. As we walk through the lobby we see, you guessed it, two Penguin fans. I say “Let’s Go Pens…” and they look at me like I’m ALF.

FRIDAY, 7:00pm – On every road trip, there is that signature moment where I realize I’m not in Pittsburgh anymore. In St’ Louis it’s the beginning of their pre game scoreboard montage. You know how every NHL team goes well out of their way to make this really cool? Well apparently the Blues marketing department did not get the memo. They give us multiple St’ Louisians screaming, “I LOVE THE BLUES !” I could care less about the Blues before that. Now I hate them.

FRIDAY, 7:08pm – Jaroslav Halak takes the ice in a Blues uniform. In an unrelated matter, my blood pressure rises 25 percent.

FRIDAY 7:30pm – Patrick Sharp fires a 60 footer past Halak for a game tying power play goal. The contingent of Hawks fans in attendance start humming Chelsea Dagger. Personally, I pine for the days when the Hawks would play the ZZ Top Classic “Every Girl’s Crazy about a Sharp Dressed Man…” after a Sharpie goal. Dare to dream.

FRIDAY, 7:40pm - St' Louis fans do this really, really dorky dance every time they get a power play. The "gentleman" next to me, who arrives 40 minutes late from Chicago, charitably describes it in Ozzie Guillen-like terms.

FRIDAY, 8:30pm – Duncan Keith is well on his way to about 70 minutes of ice time. I note about that time that the Hawks 3rd defense pairing has barely hit the ice. Right on cue, John Scott hits the ice…and then hits Brad Winchester. If you can’t play…fight. Do you know they suggested at the Hawks convention that Scott might be the next Dustin Byfuglien? Uh, yah…sure.

FRIDAY, 9:15pm – With the game tied at two, Keith channels his inner Rob Scudieri. For reasons I can’t even begin to contemplate, last year’s Norris Trophy winner whips the puck blindly around the boards where its picked off by (I’m not making this up) Roman Polak. At this point Marty Turco channels his inner Cristobal Huet. Polak dribbles a 20 MPH wrist shot through Turco’s legs for the game winner. What do you expect for a paltry $1.5 Million, saves?

FRIDAY, 9:30pm – Patrik Berglund finishes off the Hawks with a power play goal and we have our first of THREE losses on the weekend. More on that later.

FRIDAY, 9:40pm – Numerous Blues fans are kind enough to inform us that the defending Stanley Cup champions apparently suck. After about the 20th time this information is relayed, two blocks from the arena I tell Emily, “apparently the Blackhawks suck.” The beautiful immediacy of live sports…nothing matters besides that night’s result.

FRIDAY, 9:42pm – Another St’ Louis MENSA candidate walks by Emily and comments, “hey did you see the game tonight? The Hawks lost !” We did and they did…thanks for the update. Looking forward to seeing you in Good Will Hunting Two.

SATURDAY, 2pm – Totally unrelated to hockey. I watch the end of Penn State’s less than inspiring win over the worst team in division I college football. After the game Joe Paterno is interviewed coming off the field. Every human being on earth should be as vibrant and energetic as JoePa was on his 80th birthday. And yet as I watch this interview it has never been more obvious that Joe is flat out of gas. He seems barely willing or able to answer the typically mindless post game questions. Maybe the greatest man in the history of college football, and he really, really, really needs to retire.

SATURDAY, 6pm – My wife is genuinely concerned that her hair is covering the “Talbot” on the back of her t-shirt. She does not want to commit a jersey foul. For the 200th time in this blog, is it any wonder I’m so in love with this woman? For the record, she wears my Fleury jersey so well (hope she looks as good in my new Brent Johnson jersey).

SATURDAY, 6:20pm – Can any city in the NHL come up with anything more original than “Sindy Crosby?” Especially considering that St’ Louis fans would give their left…er, uh arm to have that guy in a Blue’s uniform? Hope you enjoyed your two months with Gretzky in ‘96.

SATURDAY, 6:30pm – The first St’ Louis insult of the night. All around the arena they are showing the original broadcast of game 5 of the 1981 playoff series between the Pens and Blues. I arrive at my seat just in time to see Mike Crombeen beat Greg Millen in double overtime. Nothing like dredging up Pre Mario Penguin nightmares. By the way, Crombeen’s kid plays on the Blues today. I’m old.

SATURDAY, 6:45pm – Emily and I purchased the seats for these two games independently. So go figure that in a 19,000 seat arena we are in the same section, SAME ROW, just four seats further left for game 2.

SATURDAY, 7pm – The second St’ Louis insult of the night, the Penguins’ starting line-up is never announced. This in spite of the fact that the Pens are starting former Blues legend Brent Johnson in net. For the record, the Hawks line-up was announced on FRIDAY, albeit with minimal fan fare.

SATURDAY, 7:05pm – The third St’ Louis insult of the night. Blues mascot Louie the Bear cold cocks a guy wearing a Penguin outfit at center ice. Then the Blues training staff drags the Penguin off the ice without even the benefit of a stretcher. My wife is, in her words, “appalled.” I’m admittedly a tad tweaked. I mean, what the heck does a Bear have to do with Blues?

SATURDAY, 7:06pm – The fourth St’ Louis insult of the night. “I LOVE THE BLUES…” is back.

SATURDAY, 7:10pm – Our buddy Halak is in goal again. So much for seeing former Penguin legend Ty Conklin, at least after warm-ups. I tell Emily that I would love to put 8 behind this guy (not the word I used), but in the end, I’ll settle for 1 or 2. Seriously.

SATURDAY, 7:15pm – We can debate for the next 100 years whether Bylsma should have benched Fleury but Brent Johnson is flat out on fire. He makes the first of many brilliant saves on the night. A Pens fan behind me (and there were many in attendance) screams “Johnny Vezina” all night long. There is absolutely no goaltending controversy in the Burgh but…

SATURDAY, 7:30pm – The Pens are playing Charmin soft in this first period. When Mike Rupp and Tyler Kennedy are making drop passes at the blue line instead of cycling down low, you have problems. I’m getting angry. Solely by the grace of Brent Johnson, the Pens get out of the first period in a scoreless draw.

SATURDAY 8:00pm – Frankie Pietrangelo’s kid plays for St’Louis? Ok, turns out it’s his cousin. By the way, the Blues use the acronym SOG for shots on goal on the scoreboard. This is the second coolest acronym in sports behind YAC (yards after catch). The Penguins have bad SOG so far.

SATURDAY, 8:05pm to 8:45pm – The 18 Penguin skaters finally get the memo that there is a live NHL hockey game being played at the Scottrade Center. The Pens play a much better second period, at least at even strength and somehow fire 19 shots at Halak…without scoring. If I were a Montreal fan I would vomit on my season tickets…and then cancel them. I’m really hating that guy.

SATURDAY, 8:30ish – It took about awhile but I finally notice that Mike Comrie made the road trip. I maintain my belief that though ten games, all Comrie has shown is that he breathes and takes up space. I hate to use words like useless but… I briefly mollify my anger by picturing Hilary Duff buying groceries at Giant Eagle…at least until she demands we dump this stiff on Los Angeles.

SATURDAY, 9:00pm – The Pens start the third period with another missing in action power play effort. I ponder out loud to nobody in particular, why the Blues can set-up in the zone, make passes and get shots, while Sid, Geno and company can not. As I watch the latest power play 0-fer, I’m comforted that Paul Steigerwald has probably referred to Alex Goligoski as the “rover” on the power play at least 22 times.

SATURDAY, 9:20pm – The Cooke Monster strikes. Matt Cooke pummels Erik Brewer in the St’ Louis zone for about 20 seconds while the refs never stop play. The St’ Louis crowd over two nights reminds me of a junior high girls volleyball crowd. In less than ten seconds, Cooke has the entire arena enraged and chanting loud profanity in unison. Finally, a hockey game.

SATURDAY, 9:25pm – For about the 71st time, Chris Kunitz passes up a wide open shot to try and make a pretty pass to Crosby. Repeat after me Chris, “POWER FORWARD.” For the love of all that’s good and holy, shoot the #^&n puck. A few moments later, Letang makes a brilliant steal and passes up an open shot to pass to…MIKE RUPP, who misses the net. Think maybe Halak is in the Penguin’s heads? Seriously, Montreal would not pay Kunitz money to Halak…I’m speechless.

SATURDAY, 9:30pm – Eric Johnson (yes the snow mobile accident guy) beats Brent Johnson in overtime to give the Blues a 1-0 win. If you factor in that I arrived 20 minutes late in Carolina last year, I’ve now seen TWO GOALS in my four Penguin road games. Just not feeling the love for that one overtime point.

SATURDAY, 10pm – Emily and I are surrounded by happy people. For a team that goes 7 and 5 every year, Missouri fans are quite loud and proud. At the same time, the air goes out of Philadelphia when Ryan Howard strikes out looking. Apparently everybody I know had a bad sports weekend.

So what have I learned from all this? Why nothing of course. Looking forward to our first trip to the Consol Energy Center and hoping those Winter Classic tickets come through. And LET’S GO PENS !

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

A Freaky Hockey Convergence on the Path to Doom!

For the better part of two and one half years, my wife Emily has feared what she poignantly describes as “the DOOM scenario.” Emily defines “DOOM” as a Stanley Cup match-up between the Pittsburgh Penguins and the Chicago Blackhawks.

In actuality my girlfriend Emily started preaching this in the spring of 2009. My fiancée Emily continued it with exasperated vigor in the spring of 2010, and my wife Emily maintains this fear today. And in point of fact, the doom scenario as narrowly defined has been avoided, given that the two teams avoid said confrontation on the weekend of our wedding.

Thankfully, or perhaps I should say "making the best of a potentially awkward situation," Jaroslav Halak and the Orange and Black Goon Squad conspired to quash this fear in 2010. It’s a practical impossibility for me to be happy with a Penguin playoff loss so I’ll just say this; if Sid, Geno and the Boys had to have a bad spring, May 2010 was not the worst time for it.

Emily and I maintain what most people would classify as a “mixed marriage.” We have navigated a significant cultural divide in our relationship that many couples could not overcome. In short, my hockey allegiances fall first and foremost to all things Penguins; hers are to the Hawks. Flip it around and we both cheer for the other team, on a secondary basis.

We have navigated this relationship obstacle through fortuitous conference alignments, scheduling, timing, and the good graces of Cristobal Huet. In short, the teams play in opposite conferences meaning that other than perhaps one regular season battle, they can meet only in the Stanley Cup finals. The Pens development towards Stanley Cup contenders started one or two years earlier than the Hawks. And any chance the Hawks had of getting to the finals in 2009 went were quashed by Hawks GM Dale Tallon’s post all night drinking binge signing of Huet as his goaltender.

Ok, that’s not exactly fair given that Huet was not even the starting goaltender in the 2009 playoffs. In reality, I knew the Hawks were not quite ready to beat Detroit that year, just as the Pens were not ready the year earlier. Let’s just say that feeling was “Cristolized” when Huet replaced (go figure) an injured Nikolai Khabibulin in game 4.

I assume that 450 words in to this blog the question my readers are asking is, why do I bring this up now? After all, Emily and I are happily married and our wedding went off without a hockey related hitch. In fact, I would offer that we got the opposite effect with my beautiful wife taunting my Philly friends to Chelsea Dagger the day after the Hawks game 1 victory. All is well, and life begins again.

So why, to quote my wife, am I fearing once again that “ALL ROADS LEAD TO DOOM”? Let me explain. No, is too much…let me sum up.

Emily and I are off to St’Louis this weekend. We could not believe when we looked at the schedule and saw this nugget, Blackhawks at St’Louis Friday night; Penguins at St’Louis Saturday night. Beyond the unparalleled joy of a two night reunion with Jaroslav Halak, I was astounded that our two favorite teams could be in the same city on back to back nights? It seemed nothing less than a miracle of scheduling, especially given that the Pens play in the Eastern Conference.

In retrospect that’s not the miraculous part. The miraculous part is that the Pens and Hawks are actually NOT playing on the same night. Given what’s transpired this season, I’m shocked the NHL did not schedule a doubleheader at whatever they call the arena in St’Louis.

To wit, we are 12 days in to the NHL season and the Pittsburgh Penguins and Chicago Blackhawks have played on the same night for all seven of their games. And here is the really, really scary part, they have the same result EVERY NIGHT.

Yes I know their records are slightly different because one Hawks loss came in overtime. That being said, let’s take a real cash flow approach to this rather than the NHL’s adjusted analysis which includes points for overtime losses. In short, the Pens and Hawks are both 4 and 3. Both got off to shockingly sluggish starts, both are looking better just as we get the oil changed for our trip west. The result…

Date-------------Result------ Pens/Score------ Hawks/Score

Thursday October 7th-----Loss---Philly 2-3----Colorado 3-4
Saturday October 9th-----Loss---Montreal 2-3----Detroit 2-3
Monday October 11th------Win---New Jersey 2-1----Buffalo 4-3
Wednesday October 13th---Loss---Toronto 3-4----Nashville 2-3
Friday October 15th-------Win---NY Islanders 3-2----Columbus 5-2
Saturday October 16th-----Win---Philly 5-2----Buffalo 4-3
Monday October 18th------Win---Ottawa 5-2----St’Louis 3-2

So maybe I’m going off the deep end here but this is just a tad too freaky.

It’s weird enough that one team would open the season with 7 games in 12 nights, let alone two. I’m not sure I’ve seen that other than the '95 lockout season. The fact that both teams would have the same result on each night is…well there is no other way to interpret this but, POTENTIAL DOOM!

I covered the issue last year about dual citizenship in the sports world. I’ve lived happily as a Pittsburgh fan in Chicago for 15 years. Chicagoans have overlooked my less than subtle support for the Steelers and Pens, with the notable exception of when our teams come to town. It’s an uneasy coexistence but it works, for now.

Clearly such a relationship would be strained if the Pens were to defeat the Hawks in the Stanley Cup final (or I guess in theory if the opposite scenario occurred though I can not fathom that).

That being said, our marriage clearly adds a new element to this. We’ve gone beyond just whether or not I can walk the streets of Chicago safely in my Fleury jersey (or Brent Johnson jersey if things keep going the way they are). We are now at the point of questioning whether I will come home from a business trip and find my wife has changed the locks.

To be clear, Emily is a Penguin fan. She loves the Flightless Waterfowl and has a particular affinity for the Superstar, Max Talbot. Hers is not that painful, pit in your stomach fear of a world where Chris Pronger, Michael Leighton and the Orange and Black Goon Squad carry the cup.

Her issue is one of split loyalties, driven primarily by the never ending conversion attempts of her husband. She would be thrilled if the Hawks won the cup but sad for the Penguins. And as a truly caring person, her issues are compounded by the understanding that I would not deal well with seeing the Penguins back in the Marian Hossa position after a Stanley Cup loss.

We’ve been fortunate that during the length of our relationship the Pens and Hawks have played only one time, a brilliant battle last December. In spite of the loss, I actually enjoyed the game. As for my wife, I will charitably say she appeared “uncomfortable” for close to three hours. Let’s keep in mind that as great as the game was, this was a fairly meaningless regular season event. I don’t relish the idea of experiencing her “discomfort” level if the Pens and Hawks are playing in June for Lord Stanley’s Cup.

Compounding my concerns is that Emily possesses a level of self control and human decency on this issue that tragically eludes me. No matter how torn she was, no matter what she was thinking during that game, she sat stoically throughout it. In contrast, I screamed and nearly jumped through the ceiling when Jordan Staal tied it late in regulation.

I like to think I’m mature enough to temper my reactions in a series. My days of screaming at goaltenders on TV, a la Andy Moog in the early 90s are, for the most part, behind me. Alas, I don’t think I can keep my emotions in check during the Stanley Cup finals. Let me rephrase that, I know I can not.

The boundless optimists, the Christopher Disque’s of the world say this is a good problem to have. There are worse things than your two favorite teams playing for a championship. When you consider how bad the Pens looked in their first four games, I should be happy that we are once again discussing this as a realistic possibility.

Alas, as happy as I was for the Hawks success last year, I’m not one of these, “I’m just happy if one of my team’s wins guys.” When you are born black and gold, you are black and gold for life. Plus I genuinely like the Hawks and their players and I do have a tendency to develop shall we say, adversarial relationships, with Penguin opponents. I’d just assume stay on good terms with Kaner, Toews, and Keith (if not that Slovakian winger who used to play in Detroit).

So for now I’ll simply follow the advice I gave Emily last year. Don’t panic, let things play out as they will. It’s a long season and the odds of any two teams playing in June are slim, even two of the best in the league. I will hope that the first two weeks of the season were nothing more than a freaky convergence of Gary Betteman scheduling and some inexplicable bit of hockey karma and coincidence.

In short, I will hope we can somehow avoid “DOOM” for another year.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Penguins Need to Sit Fleury…For Now

For the past 20 years or so, Sports Illustrated has run a piece called, “this week’s sign of the apocalypse.” Within that context, those who know me might think that this week’s blog entry is a campaign to get me in next week’s issue.

I can just see it now. This week’s sign of the apocalypse, “noted Penguin goaltending freak and massive Marc-Andre Fleury fan Adam Haberman wrote an internet blog where he made this statement…the Penguins should bench Fleury and run with Brent Johnson for awhile.”

There it is, clear, concise, and in writing. I am comforted that in the 30 seconds or so since I typed that paragraph, life continues to thrive on the planet earth. I can also assure you that I was not kidnapped and replaced by aliens (or Philly fans) on my honeymoon.

Ok, let’s come to grips with what I am and am not saying.

I am saying that Brent Johnson should start the next game in goal for the Penguins. I’m also saying that if he plays well, he should start the one after that. In fact, I think the Pens should run with Johnson for a few weeks if he continues to play at a high level.

I am not saying that Marc-Andre Fleury should be demoted, traded, or sent on another African safari. I am by no mean suggesting that there is or should be a goaltending controversy in the Burgh. In the end, the Penguins can not win a Stanley Cup with Brent Johnson in goal. He’s a back-up goaltender and as we know water ultimately finds its level. If there is going to be another Cup parade in the Burgh, Marc-Andre Fleury needs to be in goal, and at his best.

Which is what has lead me to this frightening crossroads just three games in to the 2010-11 season.

I have passionately defended Fleury in many forums including this one as recently as last May. I’m a firm believer in the Flower. He has his ups and downs, as does every goaltender in the NHL. That being said, he also has two trips to the Stanley Cup finals and a game 7 cup victory on his resume. Very few goaltenders can say that.

We are still talking about a man who led the Pens to 30 playoff victories in two years. We are still talking about a man who stopped two future hall of famers on point blank chances, in game 7’s on the road. With all due respect, I’m not sure Brent Johnson makes those saves.

Which is not the point.

The point is right now I’m not sure Fleury makes those saves either. And even if he does, I’m not sure he does not give up a Michael Leighton style softball 30 seconds later. That point was driven home on Saturday night when Fleury gave up a goal that Johnson (or for that matter Disque) certainly would have stopped in the final minutes against Montreal (though I’m remain unsure about Leighton).

For the last three years, the Penguins philosophy with Fleury has basically been you are the man, bar none. If you have a bad game, we will throw you right back out there the next night. I wholeheartedly agree with that. It’s the way you should handle a proven #1 goaltender in the NHL. At least as long as he lives up to his end of the bargain.

For most of his career in the Burgh, Fleury has done so. For most of calendar year 2010, he has not. He struggled in the second half of last season, in last season’s playoffs, and certainly in his first two starts.

And now its time for some accountability.

I actually thought Fleury played pretty well against Montreal, right up to the Gomez game winner. I don’t expect a goaltender to make every save but you simply can not allow that goal at any time, let along the last two minutes of a hockey game. Unfortunately, we saw a few of those in last year’s playoff series against Montreal as well.

So now Dan Bylsma needs to change the message to MAF. The message has to be that he must reestablish his position with his play on the ice. I don’t come to this decision lightly (thus the whole apocalypse comparison above) but we are there. To be honest, it’s not as dramatic you may think and there is absolutely precedent for it in the Burgh.

I would argue that the best Fleury has ever played as a Penguin was the last two months of the 2007-08 season and the playoffs that followed. You may recall that he spent half that season recovering from an ankle injury. During his absence, Ty Conklin played so brilliantly in net that many thought Conklin should remain the starter (yes, that really happened, seriously, I’m not making it up). The Penguins basically told Fleury he would have to earn the job back. And to be clear, he did…in brilliant fashion

That makes me consider at least the possibility that Fleury raises his level when he has some competition for his job, real or perceived.

The other precedent occurred in 1990. You may recall that season ended with a Penguin Stanley Cup celebration. It started with a mild goaltending controversy. It’s long since been forgotten but for the first two plus months of that season, Bob Johnson was basically rotating three goaltenders, Tom Barrasso, Frank Pietrangelo, and Wendell Young.

I readily concede that I lack any kind of objectivity when evaluating Barrasso. That being said, I think it’s fair to say that he was a far better goaltender than either of the gentlemen mentioned in the paragraph above. To be honest, it’s not even close. Barrasso is a borderline hall of famer. Frankie Pete and Young were borderline NHL players.

It’s easy to forget that Barrasso was coming off a difficult season in 1989-90; both on and off the ice. Regardless, his play in the first two months of the following year was lacking and Badger Bob responded by putting his rear end on the bench. I doubt that played well with Barrasso who could be shall we say, a bit prickly at times.

Regardless, it worked. Somewhere along the way, Johnson’s message got through. Just about the time that Pittsburgh reporters were pressing trade rumors, Barrasso found his ‘A’ game and started a brilliant run that ended with back to back cups. I can’t guarantee that Johnson’s decision to bench Tommy was the reason but I have a feeling it sent a message. In short, regardless of your pedigree, you have to earn your job. Remember, the Pens did not need Barrasso to be good, they needed him to be championship caliber.

Right now I think Bylsma needs to send that same message to Fleury. Right now that message is more critical than the “we believe in you and we know you can bounce back” message. Fleury seems a bit too comfortable to me and his play is not living up to the comfort level. Sometimes we all need a little push.

I don’t think I even need to say this given my audience but let me be clear regardless. I am not suggesting Fleury is solely responsible for the Pens failures last season. Far from it. All you need to do is watch the first 30 minutes of game 7 against Montreal to realize that. Get beyond the series long disappearance of Crosby and Malkin and just watch how many brutal, and I mean BRUTAL, defensive mistakes the Pens made in that game. It was emblematic of a series in which the entire team underachieved.

Nor am I suggesting Fleury is solely to blame for the Pens 1-2 start. To be honest, I’m concerned with what I’ve seen so far. Even yesterday’s win over the Devils was disconcerting given that New Jersey was forced to play three men short handed a la Gene Hackman’s team in Hoosiers. I half expected John McLean to play with four men and tell the ref, “My team is on the ice!”

(Quick aside, watching the Devils play with 17 men yesterday is maybe the best example of sports justice I’ve ever seen. I can not describe my joy in watching Lou Lamoriello’s team pay over and over for his mockery of the salary cap that was that absurd and asinine Kovalchuk contract. I truly, truly hope that this was the first step in Sammy Sosa on skates destroying that franchise for the next 15 years).

Still, the Pens can not win without Fleury at his best, and right now he’s just not there. Sometimes great coaching means a little tough love. That’s what Dan Bylsma needs to do to help Fleury regain his ‘A’ game. It’s worked before, and I fully expect it will work again.